Got this in the email today: A young man wants to get his beautiful blonde wife something nice for their first wedding anniversary, so he decides to buy her a cell phone. She is all excited--she loves her phone. He shows it to her and explains all the features on the phone. The next day the blonde goes shopping. Her phone rings and it's her husband. "Hi hun," he says. "How do you like your new phone?" She replies, "I just love it; it's so small and your voice is clear as a bell. But there's one thing I don't understand...

Jeff urgently needed a few days off work, but knew the Boss would not allow him to take a leave. He thought that maybe if he acted crazy then the boss would tell me to take a few days off. So, Jeff hung upside down on the ceiling and made funny noises.  His co-worker Cathy (who's blonde) asked him what he was doing?He told her that he was pretending to be a light bulb so that the Boss would think he was nuts and give him a few days off. A few minutes later the Boss came into the office and asked "What are you doing ?"  Jeff told him he was a light bulb. The boss said...

Blonde Logic: Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking....... and one blonde says to the other, "Which do you think is fartheraway... Florida or the moon?" The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida...?????" River Walk: There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank. "Yoo-hoo!" she shouts, "How can I get to the other side?" The second blonde looks up the river then down the river and shouts back, "You ARE on the other side." Blonde On The Sun: A Russian, an American, and a...

Legend has it that there is a bar in New York where, in the Ladies  room, there is a very special mirror. If one stands in front of the mirror and tells the truth, one is granted a wish. However, if one tells a lie, POOF! you are instantly swallowed up by the mirror never to be seen again. Soooooo, A redhead of questionable looks walks into the Ladies Room and stands before the mirror and says, "I think I'm the most beautiful woman in the world." POOF! The mirror swallows her. Next a rather large brunette stands before the mirror and...

One day Sally and Dave were sitting at home listening to the weather forecast during a big snowstorm.  The news said that everyone will have to park their car on the odd side of the street to allow the snow plows to clear the even side of the road.  Sally jumped up and moved the car.   The next day the storm was still continuing to dump large amounts of snow.  During the weather report it said for everyone to park on the even side of the street so that they could plow the odd side.  Again, Sally jumped out and moved the car. On the...

A blonde was driving down the road following a large truck.  When they stopped at the light, the blonde ran up to the drive of the truck and said "My name is Sally and you are losing your load".  The driver looked at here somewhat puzzled and said, "That is okay" and drove off. She continued down the road right behind him and at the next intersection light, ran back up to him and said "My name is Sally and you are losing your load".  He looked at her strange and just drove off. This cycle continued twice more.  Then when she ran up...

A blonde bought two horses, and could never remember which was which. One neighbor suggested that she cut the tail of one horse and that worked great until the other horse got his tail caught in a bush. It tore just right and looked exactly like the other horse's tail and our blonde friend was stuck again. The neighbor suggested she notch the ear of one horse. That worked fine until the other horse caught his ear on a barbed wire fence. Once again our friend couldn't tell them apart. The neighbor suggested she measure the horses for height. When she did, she was very pleased to...

A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blond female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it then slammed it shut stormed back in the house. A little later she came out of her house again went to the mail box and again opened it, slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever. Puzzled by her actions...

Once upon a time, a blonde became so sick of hearing blonde jokes that she had her hair cut and dyed brown. A few days later, as she was out driving around the countryside, she stopped her car to let a flock of sheep pass. Admiring the cute wooly creatures, she said to the shepherd, "If I can guess how many sheep you have, can I take one?" The shepherd, always the gentleman, said, "Sure!" The blonde thought for a moment and, for no discernible reason, said, "352." This being the correct number, the shepherd was, understandably, totally amazed,...

  A blonde decides to try horseback riding, even though she has had no lessons or prior experience. She mounts the horse unassisted and the horse immediately springs into motion. It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle. In terror, she grabs for the horse's main but cannot get a firm grip. She throws her arms around the horse's neck, but she slides down the side of the horse anyway. The horse gallops along, seemingly impervious to its slipping rider. Finally, giving up her frail grip, she leaps away from...